YES.... BUT ....!

I am writing a daily blog (Monday to Friday probably!)  on preparing spiritually and physically

to lead a Pilgrimage of 100 miles in September.

for details of the Pilgrimage, click on the dropdown Cotwold Pilgrimage bar at the top of this page 

My eye was caught this morning, just as it was yesterday; this time, by the daily flipchart of a calendar that sits on the kitchen window sill.

YES – BUT -

“Lord, I will follow you, but …” (Luke 9:61)

Trust completely in God, says the comment, and when He brings you to a new opportunity of adventure, offering it to you, see that you take it.

I’m not very good at doing that.

I’d rather play it safe.

Abide by the rules.

Conform.

Be careful.

Oh yes, that is what I have heard so very often throughout my life: be careful. And I fear I conveyed the same message to my children.

But, as George Elliott so famously said, it’s never too late to be what you were meant to be.

So maybe it’s time I let go.

Trusted God.

And skipped into this big adventure to which He is always calling:

Following Him.

Seizing the day – with Him.

Appreciating the fun and the challenge and the excitement of what He offers, where He leads.

I don’t HAVE to have an adventure.

I GET to have an adventure.

And if I don’t grab the opportunity and adventure He is offering to me right now, He’ll offer it to someone else. I don’t want to let my large BUT get in the way (!!!!!)

What adventure is He offering you?

And what’s preventing you accepting the dare?

BOOSTING ENERGY LEVELS

I am writing a daily blog (Monday to Friday probably!)  on preparing spiritually and physically

to lead a Pilgrimage of 100 miles in September.

for details of the Pilgrimage, click on the dropdown Cotwold Pilgrimage bar at the top of this page 

The inside of doors of the kitchen cupboards have notes and papers and info stuck randomly across their surface.

To remind me.

I never look at them; I’ve become too accustomed to their presence.

So this morning when an overnight house guest comments on them I see them through new eyes.

And pull them off and scrunch them up.  Decluttering is good, I tell myself.

But one catches the unseeing eye afresh: Boosting the energy levels.  I wonder when I first saw it or pinned it there as a reminder.  When my energy levels were low, lower than they appear to be now.

Probably last year sometime.

I scan the list: ten things to do.

-      get plenty of rest

-      exercise daily

-      drink lots of water

-      eat high energy foods

-      take a good multi-vitamin

-      feed your brain

-      maintain a positive attitude

-      watch your mouth

-      avoid people who deplete you

-      connect with God

It all sounds – admirable; do-able; good advice.

In practice I find a need a certain amount of energy in the first place to decide to do all this.

And maybe the order is upside down.

I shall start by connecting with God. After that everything else will probably fall into place.

It’s a good place to start.

My heart needs to connect with Him constantly.  This morning’s reading in Proverbs reminds me:

Above all, guard your heart for from it flow the springs of life. (4:23)

Yes.

The springs of life, energy levels, a sense of well-being, it all comes from the ONE who first breathed life into me and sustains me each day by His breath of life.

I’m off to get a glass of water.

And maybe have a nap – after I’ve done today’s 10,000 minimum steps.

LOVERS AND WEDDINGS AND BEAUTY AND JOY

I am writing a daily blog (Monday to Friday probably!)  on preparing spiritually and physically

to lead a Pilgrimage of 100 miles in September.

for details of the Pilgrimage, click on the dropdown Cotwold Pilgrimage bar at the top of this page 

Monday morning.

Dare I step on the scales?

It’s early – I am up soon after the larks, due the church builders crashing into our garden very early. The Vicar slumbers on. He will be Mondayish soon. *

I like an early start.

My mother use to wake me at 6am every morning.

There was hot Ribena when I was small, fresh lemon juice diluted in  hot water when I was a teenage (my choice!)

The command Don’t forget to read your Bible.

That is what is engrained on my mind as I wake daily.

Alas there’s no hot drink presented to me these days and I need coffee.  I take the mug of fragrant liquid and sit on the rocking chair. Open today’s reading on my Kindle.

It’s all very different to 50 or so years ago.

* * * *

We’re in Song of Solomon and then Psalm 45.  Lovers and weddings and beauty and joy.

It feeds my soul.

Inspires my prayers:

May my tongue speak words like the pen of a ready writer  - and may I be the ready writer too. (Psalm 45:1)

May the Lord pour the oil of joy on me, as I continue on this road of healing from the PTSS and depression. (Ps 45:7)

May I be the seal on my husband’s heart and our love unquenchable and strong as death. (SoS 8:6)

And may I continue on the path to physical strength and health so that my body glorifies God and my husband is content with me. (SofS 8:10)

So I stepped on the scales.

One whole pound lower.

* Mondayish: defined by OED as how clergy feel after a busy and demanding Sunday.

My last blog posting

 I am writing a daily lost on preparing spiritually and physically

to lead a Pilgrimage of 100 miles in September.

for details of the Pilgrimage, click on the dropdown Cotwold Pilgrimage bar at the top of this page 

I celebrated Communion at 8am this morning.

That meant I read out the Ten Commandments in full.

As ever, I found myself thinking of what might be some of the modern equivalents we should or should not be doing - neither our man servant nor our maid servant, our ox or our ass....

and was again convicted about not working on the sabbath day.

Now I know this is not strictly speaking the Sabbath - that was a Saturday, from sundown on Friday to sundown on Saturday.

Twenty four hours to rest and keep holy  - six days shalt thou labour and do thou all that thou hast to do, but the seventh is the Sabbath of the Lord thy God. In it thou shalt do no work.

I am quoting from memory but that seems the gist of it.

Resting from all that one has to do - just as God Himself did after the six days of all HE had to do.

So, I don't NEED to be writing and blogging today; that's what I do during the other six days.

But today.

Today I can rest and rejoice and relax into God.

My chief end is after all  to glorify God  and enjoy Him forever.

So I shall.  This is my last post.

The last post on a Sunday .

Six days I shall do all that I have to do.

And the seventh is for something else entirely.

THE HAPPIEST PLACE TO BE

 I am writing a daily blog on preparing spiritually and physically

to lead a Pilgrimage of 100 miles in September.

for details of the Pilgrimage, click on the dropdown Cotwold Pilgrimage bar at the top of this page 

Today has been a curate’s egg kind of day.

This morning, I stood at the happiest place: the arrivals gate. Oh the joy of hearing the cries of delight, the sobs of joy, the squeals of pleasure, as loved ones were reunited.

Smiles and laughter. Hugs and kisses. Exclamations and enthusiasm.

Would my own loved ones ever come through that door?

And would I recognize them?

I always have that ridiculous fear when waiting for my family and friends – that I won’t recognize them.

But of course I always do.

There they are!

And my eldest granddaughter she leaps up into my arms, words spilling out to tell me of the overnight flight and all that she, they, have done.

And her younger sister holds out her arms – she’s balanced precariously in her car seat on top of the luggage.

My poor daughter  is pushing the luggage AND the buggy – so is doubly glad to see me.

The happiness of reunions and being welcomed and recognized.

Surely a foretaste of arriving home in heaven?

Of being welcomed and recognized and swept up in joy and affirmation.

* * * *

And then this afternoon.

The unhappiest place to be: driving across a hot dusty crowded London. Friday afternoon in a tired capital.

It’s only 14 miles door to door:  it took exactly two hours and ten minutes.

People were hot and tired and frustrated.

Horns blared and bleated.

Finger gestures were indescribable.

Cars were cutting in and cutting up and cutting out.

Voices were raised.

It was all too tempting to join in.

And then something reminded me of Amy Carmichael and her writing.

Her book IF

If a sudden jar can cause me to speak an impatient, unloving word, then I know nothing of Calvary love. *

*For a cup brimful of sweet water cannot spill even one drop of bitter water however suddenly jolted.

How sweet was my spirit this afternoon?

What flavour was spilt?

* * * *

No walking today.  Fewer than 1,000 steps, after the ten, and eleven and twelve thousand of earlier days.

Relationships take priority over rules.

Joy over judgement.

Tomorrow is another day: and I am booked for a 7 mile hike with a friend – to Hampstead Heath and back.

And then a powerplates session.

* * * *

And I’ve been in the happiest of places today.

I’m grateful.

It’s good to have my girls back.

IMPATIENT - moi?

DAY FOUR of week one

I am writing a daily blog on preparing spiritually and physically to lead a Pilgrimage of 100 miles in September.

for details of the Pilgrimage, click on the dropdown Cotwold Pilgrimage bar at the top of this page 

IMPATIENCE

I stepped on the scales this morning.

And quickly stepped off again – the readout was wrong.

Tried again.

Nothing.

As in, nothing has changed.

But that can’t be right!  I’ve had no sugar (except in apples) no cakesnobiscuitsnosnacksnoindulgence.

(Well, apart from those two glasses of mulled wine I admitted to in an earlier blog.)

I’ve walked. Miles. Even the pedometer agrees.

Climbed up and down the escalators – 12 of them on that one journey to and from the centre of town.

Had two exhausting sessions on the powerplates.

Been very, very careful.

And nothing has changed. Not an ounce has been lost, after all these days of trying.

* * * *

Oh, wait.  Today is Thursday.

That’s only three whole days actually.

I thought I would have dropped a whole dress size by now.  At least.

For I am impatient.

I like quick results.

Yes, I know that weight stays off if you lose it slowly and steadily. I know it takes weeks, not days, to regain fitness and strength and tone-ness and be able to walk not just a marathon but a whole 100 miles.

But I want it NOW. I’m not sure I’m up for the long haul.

Sigh.

* * * *

If I’m honest, it’s the same in my spiritual life.

I want it all.  NOW.

All the spiritual gifts.

All the blessings.

All the transformed character and holiness and Christ-like-ness.

And God says gently,

It takes a lifetime.

A lifetime of being honed and tested and shaped and polished.

Of being blessed and being a blessing.

A lifetime of allowing Me to change you into the person I mean you to be.

* * * *

Gradually, day by day, continually, becoming more and more like Him.

Oh that I longed to be transformed into His likeness as much as I long to be transformed physically.

To be radiant with His likeness, looking to Him, allowing Him to change me.

God - grant me patience.

Please enter my life in all your power and make me more like You.

* * * *

“Nothing between us and God, our faces shining with the brightness of his face. And so we are transfigured much like the Messiah, our lives gradually becoming brighter and more beautiful as God enters our lives and we become like him.”

2 Corintians 3:18 (The Message)

ON A ROLL

PREPARING FOR A PILGRIMAGE    WEEK ONE: DAY THREE

I’m on a roll. 

And it’s not the roll you were possibly expecting.

I am rolling my way upon the Lord.

This year, I am reading through the entire Bible – it’s not the first time I have ever done this but thanks to a friend’s recommendation I am doing so using George Guthrie’s “Reader’s Guide to the Bible: Chronological Reading Plan.” And it's on my Kindle so I read it anywhere, any time, as well as my regular 'first thing in the morning evangelical upbringing Quiet Time.'

Previously I have tried the Cambridge Daily Reading Bible, which was great because it gave a reading from both of the Testaments – and actually takes two years.

Less of a hurry, more time to ponder.

I’ve started that twice.  Not sure I ever quite finished on either time.

Then I used the NLT iWorship Bible which goes straight through from Genesis to Revelation in a year.  By August when I was still on the Old Testament I was longing, really longing for the New Testament!  I found it moderately tedious if I am honest, in spite of the wonderful daily reflections printed alongside and the worship-thoughts inserted regularly.

So now I am using a chronological reading method – and so far, am loving it.  Interspersing Job with Genesis to remind us Job was in the time of the Patriarchs; reading David’s story alongside the Psalms he wrote at the time; and seeing it all as God’s Plan for His people, mapped out on a time-line.

Act One: God’s Plan for All People

Act Two: God’s Covenant People

Act Three: God’s New-Covenant People.

So I’m on a roll.

Yesterday, I read Psalm 37.

Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him and he will do this: he will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.

And every day, alongside the Bible, I read a daily thought from Amy Carmichael – one of my most favourite spiritual writers. Today, it’s from Psalm 37 in Kay’s translation:

Roll thy way upon the Lord.

She writes:

Way means a trodden path, the journey of life, today’s life. Often when we cannot lift a thing we can roll it and so the Hebrew uses this simple word which we can so easily understand.  Roll everything that concerns thee upon the Lord. Roll it again, no matter how many times you did so before, and then rest, “assure thyself in Him; and He, He Himself, will work.” (French Version, Darby)

I am preparing for a Pilgrimage.

I am on a roll.

STARTING OVER

Week One: Day Two Yesterday evening was cold.  So very cold.  We shivered as we sat in our studies on what used to be the ground floor of the Vicarage.  The church boiler is broken; there’s no money for a new one; and it was icy.

The Vicar came upstairs to the Vicarage flat.

Shivering.

He spotted an unfinished bottle of mulled wine still sitting on the shelf, waiting to be warmed and consumed.

I sat on the sofa, shivering still, glad of the radiator at my side – and gladly too held out my hand  to take the steaming ruby liquid.  It should be Pimms right now, I thought, the warmth of the hot mulled wine seeping into my chilled blood.

The second (small!) glass slipped down easily too.

Comforting, defrosting, soothing.

The Vicar left for PCC.  My daughter called me on Skype and I laughed to tell her of the Mulled Wine.

-      but you said no alcohol, she accused me. In your blog, getting ready. No alcohol!

So I need reminders.

I need accountability.

I’ve started a chart.  With ticks as I have no gold stars to embellish it. There will be gladness of heart to see each square as positively done.

Maybe a reward for a week’s worth of YES?

And the memory is physically with me today; after half an hour on the powerplates yesterday I have aching muscles in places I had forgotten I had muscles.

A good reminder to carry with me all day.

I need a reminder of the Lord as well.

A verse from the morning’s readings, to learn and to carry and to dwell in as I walk and travel?

I’m glad I bought a useful little pack when in the States.

And my Gratitude Journal.

Time to start again properly on the second thousand.

It feels like a new beginning.

Each day is a new beginning: we get to start over.

Praise God that He makes that possible!

Lamentations 3:22-24 (NLT)

The faithful love of the Lord never ends!  His mercies never cease.

Great is his faithfulness;
 his mercies begin afresh each morning.

I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance;
 therefore, I will hope in him!”

A God-given, God-inspired, God-led shape

Preparing for Pilgrimage: WEEK ONE

I’ve been in the States for just over a month – mostly holiday but some work.  And I have done very little exercise. I’ve walked a bit, often on the beach. Carried the three year old grandchildren on my back (not both at the same time I hasten to add)  bounced the littlest grandchild on my lap thus developing the arm muscles (he’s a hefty little chap) bent to load and unload the dishwasher countless times – does that count as ab work?

A month off from the gym though; and from hills – the South Carolina coast is not named The Low Country for no apparent reason.

And I have eaten to my heart’s content: made blueberry pancakes for breakfast (one cup of mixture to one cup of water) baked oatmeal and raisin cookies with the older grandchildren (add one egg and one stick of butter) consumed crabcakes and apple pie and icecream … wine in the evenings and coffee with 'half and half' in the mornings …

Four months, or sixeen weeks, tomorrow, I shall be leading the Cotswold Pilgrimage.  One hundred miles of walking, over just six days, on the steep Cotswold Escarpment, from Chipping Campden to Bath Abbey.  And not just physical leading; the spiritual leading comes too – daily prayers and meditations as we walk, talks each evening. Twelve American or British women depending on me not to lead them off track.

I need to prepare, to be ready, to be in good shape.  I’m in good shape – for the shape I’m in.

But there is, must be, can be, a better shape.

A God-given, God-inspired, God-led shape.

So I began this morning. And decided to write a daily blog on my progress – so that you can keep me accountable!  Keep me accountable physically and spiritually, as I take time with the Lord, walk up and down our hilly road, cut down on the caffeine and sugar and alcohol.  Lose eight pounds and tone up.

Keep me accountable as I pray and read and walk and write.

Might you join me in over the next 16 weeks?  It’s quite a challenge so let me know your thoughts and comments and helpful suggestions as we go along this road together!

Oh, this morning so far: only one cup of coffee, lots of water, an instructor-led half an hour on the power plates at the gym, and a quick jog down and then back up the steep hill on which we live.

Still to do? Another 8,000 steps minimum, daily Bible reading (Guthrie’s Reading God’s Story, a year’s reading through the Bible in chronological order) and more water and more protein.

Here goes; will you join me?