The main thing I have learnt this January

How to stave off the annual blues of deepest darkest January?

I've been posting regularly throughout January about  alleviating the bleak midwinter blues - learning about the Revd Sydney Smith, hugs and hugging, living as well as you dare, twinkly lights, sleep.....  check the January post archives if you missed anything.

And now January is coming to an end - its's February on Friday!  So, in this last post on the winter blues, what has January really taught me?

What I think I overlooked or forgot is the encouraging fact that January is a new beginning!

A fresh start.

A field of pristine untrodden sparkling snow awaiting the first footprint. 

photos taken whilst I was on the Captivating Conference in Colorado in February 2012

 

A fresh start is almost always exciting – as a child, that thrill at the start of the school year with new pencils to sharpen, new books to get ready, new uniform clothes, the eager anticipation of seeing friends again, that sense of adventure, heartpounding thrill and newness.

And inhaling the faint air of exciting possibility.

Even now, starting a new journal – opening to a blank page, wondering what the words will be describing as the year progresses, what adventures and emotions will be committed to the paper.

Maybe it’s to do with the fact that we have a God who also enjoys new things.

“This is what God says: ‘Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history.  Be alert, be present.  I’m about to do something brand new.  There it is!  I’m making a road through the desert…’”  (The Message).

“Do not remember the former things, or consider the things of old.  I am about to do a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?  I will make a way in the wilderness …”  (NRSV)  Isaiah 43:19

God is always doing new things and moving us on and changing us to be the people He wants us to be.

He wants to make a road through (THROUGH!) the desert – not take us out of the desert but enable to cross it and He does a new thing to enable this to happen.

But sometimes the new is scary.

That newness at the beginning of a school term could be scary too. Would we like the new teacher? Would we be in the same class as our best friends?  Would we fit in? Would we cope?

The anticipation is tinged with anxiety and apprehension.

What will happen this year?  Will we cope?  Will we like the changes? And even – where is God in all of this?

But there’s help for this, too, in Hebrews 13:8

For Jesus doesn’t change – yesterday, today, tomorrow, he’s always totally himself.” (The Message)

Or, as many know it,

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” (NRSV)

Jesus is the same: all may change but Jesus never.  And THAT’s where our security lies, that’s where we can find our stability and confidence.  The Lord Jesus never changes; He is always there for us, always loving us, always there to talk to.  We trust in Him, look to Him, and know that we will never be shaken when we keep Him at the centre of our lives.

So there’s the best, proven part of my survival kit.

Putting Him at the centre of my life.

Not just for January but for the whole year.

And not just for 2013, but for the rest of my life.

 

What are you taking from January into the rest of this year  - to help and inspire and encourage you?

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For that hardest of hard days

  They said that Monday was the worst day of the year. But they didn’t know of her darkest, deepest, hardest days. Those black days, each in their own way so terrible she thought she might not survive, might go mad.

January days are short and dark and cold. Days of pain are long and pain comes back – or maybe never goes. What to do, what to do? Where and how to alleviate the pain, to know that spring will come again?

Into the pain come words of hope and there is gratitude for friends who pray, not even asking for what they pray but who support and comfort and are simply THERE.  Often people want to know what they are praying for – and it’s a ruse for prurient curiousity and Christian gossip. Good friends simply pray not necessarily knowing the what and where and how and why.

So she writes of ways to alleviate those January blues. Walks the beach and tries to pray.

Sings harder and louder (where no-one can hear) of grace and mercy and love and peace.

“Lord I come before your throne of grace… Lord of mercy, You have heard my cry; Through the storm You're the beacon, My song in the night...." (R + C Critchley, (c) Kingsway music)

Knows the truth of the Messiah who comes into impossible messes and makes miracles happen.

Gives her broken heart to the One who does real heart transplants and gives her His.  (Ezekial 11:19)

Proves that joy happens when she opens herself to be enveloped by God’s Presence. (Zechariah 8:8)

Needs a month of festival – from sorrow into gladness and mourning into a holiday: Purim, looking forward to a February of fruit and fasting in order to fall back into festival for Easter.

Reads blogs and posts and books and articles that are positive and encouraging.

Learns to skip and jump EVEN when it’s a bad day, when a friend takes her by the hand and skips her down the beach, arms swinging. Says, Smile – even through the tears.

Hears a friend say: God can make something beautiful out of our mess if we hand it over to Him to transform.

Remembers that ALL IS GIFT – even in the brokenness of broken hopes and broken dreams, broken hearts and broken days, the God of all comforts goes on giving and giving. Mending and healing. Transplanting and transforming.

ALL IS GRACE, amazing grace – through Christ alone who translates sorrow into joy, transfigures pain into healing.

 

 

CHRIST OF THE CROSS, WE COME TO YOU –

FOR YOU ALONE CAN MAKE US WHOLE

(David Adams)

What has helped you most, on those difficultest of days?

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Share this with someone who is finding life hard right now?

Your daily survival kit for this year:

We are in the middle of a mini-series on alleviating, surviving, truimphing over, the bleak midwinter blues of January. Sign up to get the rest delivered straight into your email box! I've just had an email from a dear friend  - with the most amazing survival kit that we all need.  Where she got it from, I have no idea - no-one is attributed with authorship, so if you know where it comes from, PLEASE let me know!  But I pass it on as a slightly tongue-in-cheek daily survival kit:  fill your bag with these few things and keep taking them out to remind yourself.

 

 

DAILY SURVIVAL  KIT 

to help you each day of this new year:

A Toothpick ... to remind you to  pick the good qualities in everyone, including  yourself.

A Rubber Band ... to remind you to be flexible. Things might not always  go the way you want, but it can be worked out.

A Band-Aid ... to remind you to  heal hurt feelings, either yours or someone else's.

An Eraser ... to remind you  everyone makes mistakes. That's okay, we learn from our  errors.

A Candy  Kiss ... to remind you everyone needs a hug or a compliment  everyday.

A Mint  ... to remind you that you are worth a mint to your family  & me.

 Bubble  Gum ... to remind you to stick with it and you can accomplish  anything.

A Pencil ... to remind you to  list your blessings every day.

A Tea Bag ... to remind you to take time to relax daily and go over  that list of blessings.

This is what makes life worth living every minute, every day 

May you have love, gratitude, friends to cherish, caring, sharing,laughter, music, and  warm feelings in your heart in 2013.

AND, I have to add, the gratitude in counting each day's gifts gives so much blessing and a  change of mental attitude. How can doing one such small simple thing make this enormous difference?

All is gift.

Counting - are you?

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. (James 1:17, NIV)

What would you add to this list?
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Your suggestions for beating those bleak midwinter blues ....

.... were just great! This mini-series on how to alleviate the dreadful January blues has been extremely helpful - to me and, it seems to you lots of you too.  And here we are, almost half way through January already.  How has it been for you?

Many of us can sometimes have those SAD feelings at this time of year: so we've looked at making Resolutions that energise us, living as well as we dare, getting enough sleep (or hibernating!) and realising that lots of hugs and cuddles can have a very salutary effect upon us - as well as being rather fun sometimes. At least three hugs a day!

Then there is the summer to look forward to - planning a trip, and especially, planning a Pilgrimage, to walk the Via Francigena in Tuscany! A vacation with a difference  - led by my husband and me; and already one week is nearly fully booked! Come too?

And the ideas keep coming. Today a friend sent me this great link to the gift of sleep, by Julie Ackerman Link in Daily Bread. Julie writes:

I’m sometimes tempted to believe that the work I do when I’m awake is more important than the work God does while I sleep. But refusing God’s gift of sleep is like telling Him that my work is more important than His. If we do not come apart and rest awhile, we may just plain come apart.

Oh yes.  That's me.

I loved the idea of special things to do at this time of year, from Sarah:

I read on a blog somewhere ideas for establishing routines/traditions that you do ONLY during the dark winter months — enjoying the season for what it is. The two ideas that I can recall at the moment are stringing white twinkle lights on your mantel and turning them on as soon as you get home (or when it turns dark) and routinely dining by candlelight. Very cozy, which sounds like a good theme for January!

We love cozy!  And lovely scents - 

Another beat-the-January-blues idea — buying special hand cream/lotion/soap, scented candles, bath salts, etc., in scents that are pleasing and cozy — and use them only in the winter months (and it so happens that post-Christmas is a good time to get them on sale!). I think this goes along nicely with the “live as well as you dare” theme! 

And Joy (from Words of Joy) wrote about hugging:  I am one of life’s huggers. My friends and family willingly submit to my embraces –others I allow time to get to know me and relax about it first!  Cuddling, hugging and embracing are all symbols of our love and care for others. They enhance life emotionally if not by years. Consider yourself ‘virtually hugged’, Penelope!

And what not to do?

On the list of things NOT to do can you please add: lounging in front of the TV watching indiscrimately any daft old program at the same time as munching on junk food and drinking too much alcohol.. very bad habit to get into but easy to fall into this trap in the Winter evenings..  So one vote for enjoying countryside and writing poetry and a NO vote for tv !

So there's a choice - yours and mine, as Mandy wrote:

It is a conscious choice and when I allow myself time for a hot bubble bath, pjs and bed at a sensible hour with a hot water bottle, it is so much better than when I listen to the lure of social media or reading just a little more. Thanks for the reminder that we only need to be who God calls us to be.

And perhaps the best comment?

I, and two little girls, are available for hugs whenever needed. 

Those two little girls are my granddaughters. They hug the best!

What are you doing to help alleviate the bleak midwinter? I have to admit I'm now cheating - I'm in Florida! 

 

 

 

A fourth way to alleviate the bleakmidwinter blues!

I'm blogging my way out of any potential midwinter blues! I'm only making resolutions that bring energy and enthusiasm; I'm following advice from the Revd Sidney Smith to live as well as I dare right now; I'm getting as much sleep as I can; and I'm enjoying hugs and cuddles like never before. And here's another way that helps. Booking a summer vacation - it's something to look forward to and even though I don't want to wish my life away, there is something rather encouraging and enervating about planning something special for a future event. And something which will energise me and be a real treat, which will get me fitter spiritually as well as physically, and in a most beautiful part of the world.

So I thought you might like to come along!

It's a very special Pilgrimage - and there are just a few places left for the September dates.

Come join us for a Pilgrimage on the Via Francigena? We walk about 10 miles a day; our luggage is moved for us; and we have special times of prayer, devotional talks, spiritual exercises - and plenty of time to relax, laugh, walk, talk or be in silence. It's incredibly beautiful, for our souls and our spirits as well!

Here are a few introductory details, to whet your appetite.  Contact me for more information. We'd love you to come too!

NEW FOR 2013 - Italian Pilgrimages
San g path
San Gimignano
VFmap
Canterbury to Rome
via f pilgrim
Via Francegina
Siena
Siena
Mays Farm MAYS FARMRead more
LogoVisit our website
BOOKING
If you are interested in coming on one of the walks, please email us for full details and a booking form. To reserve your place there is a deposit of £200 with the balance due 8 weeks prior to the Pilgrimage.  Places are limited to just 10 people maximum (plus us) so don't delay!
Please pray for us as we put this together; and pray about whether you might be able to come. Do feel free to contact us with any questions regarding the walk. We are so excited about this opportunity and really hope you might be able to join us; and do pass the details on to others you know who might like to come too.

 

Grace and peace,
warmly,
Kim and Penelope

 

Kim & Penelope Swithinbank
Ministries By Design
Mays Farm, Hullavington
Walking the Via Francigena
San G framed

We are excited to be sending you the details for the first of our new pilgrimage retreats - in Tuscany, next June and September.
As you know, Penelope has been leading
Pilgrimages on the Cotswold Way for many years and many women have appreciated that opportunity.
But now Kim will be joining her in leading retreats and walks for both sexes, for singles and for marrieds  - and we
want you to have the opportunity to come too!
QUESTIONS? call us, we'd love to chat with you!
UK: 07870 497365
USA: (til  Jan 21) : 843 325 5220
fresco
The Via Francegina
This old pilgrim route goes from Canterbury, England, all the way to Rome. Archbishop Sigericus of Canterbury walked it in 994, and wrote down the names of the places he'd passed through. The route has been recreated so that you can follow in the footsteps of thousands of pilgrims over the centuries who have walked these ancient footpaths. You will be walking through the gorgeous countryside of Tuscany; as you walk there will be time to reflect, to seek the Lord, to have time away from the busyness of everyday life. But with Kim there too it won't be silent all the way!! And each evening there will be devotional times led by Kim and/or Penelope.
You will walk each day, but your bags will be magically taken on to the next hotel where we will all have dinner together in the evenings, and you will have many opportunities for tasting local wines and foods.
The route is stunningly beautiful - we have already walked it and just loved it. From the ancient hill top villages to the refreshingly cool Roman-built swimming pool to achingly beautiful old churches and fabulous gelato .... this is a glorious opportunity for you to experience a vacation with a difference.
The vacation will be organised by Alternative Travel Group and you can look on their website for further information about the walks. ATG journey
However, all your bookings and payments will be done through Ministries By Design, so that it is very easy for you - we will do all the admin!
courtyard

Dates:
There is a choice of dates:
June 23 - 30
Sept 7 - 14
This is an 8 day holiday. We arrive on day 1, walk from San Gimignano to Montalcino over the next 6 days and leave on day 8.
COST - £1395 (HB)
 
All costs are per person, sharing a twin bedded room with private bathroom facilities.
You will need to arrange your own flights to Italy (Pisa airport is recommended but Rome works too), local travel to San Gimignano and from Montalcino and also your own travel insurance.  Other extras are any drinks you require with dinner, and provisions/snacks for lunch each day. Everything else is included, which makes it incredibly good value.
Once you have booked,  we will send you the full details including what to bring with you, and how to prepare for this walk - physically and spiritually!

 

Hilltop town

Alleviating the January Blues - part two

How to stave off the annual blues of deepest darkest January? I decided to take positive action this year. First there was a decision to make  - not Resolutions, but decisions that energise me and enthuse me.

Then, I started a survival kit following the advice of the Rev Sydney Smith (you can read about it here if you missed part one) in order to prevent the anticlimax and antacids of bleak midwinter blues.  But in spite of following a few of his suggestions, I found I needed something more.

Sleep.

Deep, deep sleep.

Maybe it’s the urge to hibernate. To sleep through the cold and damp and dark.

Maybe it’s a desire to escape.

Or maybe it’s just a reflection of how much sleep I am missing, of the hours I need to catch up after the busyness and stressfulness of the weeks before Christmas.

I certainly know that I don’t function well if I have had too little sleep. Who does? Most of us are not like Winston Churchill or Margaret Thatcher, both of whom are reputed to have needed only three or four hours sleep each night. I need at least seven and preferably eight hours under the covers.

And I have discovered that there are ways to help me achieve those hours.

-       get ready for bed early. If I leave it until it’s almost past my bed time I am too tired to be bothered to go upstairs. So then I procrastinate and then it gets later and later. And there’s something rather comforting about being in my pyjamas early, ready for bed, but still pottering about downstairs.

-       dim the lights. Too much bright light too late at night is far too energizing. So a small occasional lamp, and not the main lights, helps relaxation. (Sitting gazing at the embers of the fire, by candlelight, in my pyjamas, is remarkably soporific. If only!!)

-       dim the electronics. It’s all too tempting to check emails or social media sites last thing at night, but it actually stimulates my brain. As does any moving image, whether it’s a film, the 10 o’clock news or YouTube.  I’m learning to resist the temptation.

-       prayers in bed.

Being in bed in time to spend a few moments with the Lord.  A short Compline; or some Celtic prayers from David Adams; or the Examen from Ignatius. Handing the day back to the Lord calms and restores me and settles me in a way that is hard to explain but which leads to a better quality sleep.

-       a hot water bottle. Nice to be cosy!

But even more, I know that the quality of my sleep has to do with the quality of my day.

"It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep." Psalm 127:2 (ESV)  My days are too often a hurlyburly of rush and catchup and then I forget to breathe. Just breathe.

I read this the other day:

Oh yes, that's me. Certainly the me I used to be. But it doesn't make me restful and peaceful and someone I think others would like to be with. And now I am older, fast approaching a rather large birthday, I know that my body and my mind and my heart crave that rest and peace.

Tranquillity. Space. Rest.  And if I don't live like that now, I never will.  It's a conscious choice - no one else can choose it for me! Why rush around in that vainness mentioned in Psalm 127:2 when I actually don't enjoy it anyway? Instead of thinking 'I have to be everything' I can choose to think, 'I have to be me, the me God made me to be.'

And that me needs tranquillity and space and rest.

And good sleep.

Now I’m feeling really sleepy …  time for a nap, I think.

What have you found that helps you sleep better? And what helps you with the January blues?

 

 

 

 

 

Alleviating the January Blues - part one

January is such a LONG month. Christmas is over. The days are  short and dark and cold. The news is gloomy and I’ve eaten too much recently. Summer warmth and balmy days seem a distant promise.

How to stave off the annual bleak midwinter blues of January?

The trick is to prevent them before they have time to begin. To have a survival kit ready to pull out at a moment’s notice.

So, over the next few days, I’m putting together my suggestions. I've already blogged about how to make sure you can keep those New Year Resolutions; now comes the survival kit!

First, I’m following another rather more famous cleric – the Rev Sydney Smith, who also suffered from low spirits in the winter and who wrote to a friend in 1820 offering ideas for winter solace.

“1st,” he wrote, “live as well as you dare.”  I like that.

He then advocated cool showers, the avoidance of poetry, music and serious words, and not to expect too much from human life. Those I am not so keen on.

But what about some of his other suggestions:

-       amusing books

-       being as busy as you can

-       attending to the effects coffee and tea produce upon you

-       being as much as you can in the open air

-       making the room ‘where you commonly sit gay and pleasant’

-       don’t be too severe upon yourself

-       keep good blazing fires

-       ‘be firm and constant in the exercise of rational religion’

-       ‘short views of human life – not further than dinner or tea’

-       see as much as you can of friends who like you – and of acquaintances who amuse you

 

 

My survival kit now has a few good things in it. What might  you add to the list?

But yet, it's not enough....  so come back  later this week for  parts two and three - why not sign up to have them delivered straight into your inbox?

 

 

How to keep those New Year Resolutions

 

Over the next week or two, we will be looking at January - because for some of us, it's a long depressing dark month. Christmas joy has evaporated, even though in one sense it is always Christmas — because Christ, Immanuel,  is always with us.

Keeping the rejoicing going can be hard work in January. We forget it's still Christmas - the wise men haven't even arrived until Epiphany, on January 6th. The decorations go up so early in late November or early December that they no longer stay up until Epiphany as a reminder that it is still Christmas. When Love came down - and stayed.

But there can be good things in January so we'll look at Resolutions and alleviating the blues and hibernating and New Things. Join us? Sign up to get them all delivered straight into your inbox!

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS: Love them or hate them, they are in the air right now.

New Year’s Day is nearly here. A day to begin afresh. A day bursting with new year zeal, an unmarked fresh-snow-fall start. A day for making  Resolutions, writing down lists and intending, really and truly intending, to keep to the list THIS year.

At least for the whole of January.

Smugly, the list grows; lose those extra pounds, go to bed earlier, join – and go to – the gym, tidy the house, find a new job, declutter, read the Bible every day, pray, keep in touch with friends  ….

Good intentions.

But how to keep them?

Maybe I’m starting from the wrong place.

Maybe my lists are impossible to keep.

Maybe I am setting myself up for failure from the start.

One thing I have discovered about myself over the many years I’ve known me is that I am hopeless at long term implementation. I can set out with good intentions but soon they change and become impossible tasks, things I am failing to do, hopelessly unattainable aspirations. And the failure leads into that horrible downward spiral -

self criticism

low self esteem

depression

failure – again.

I  tried the Happiness Project.

 

It worked – for a while. I even made myself a star chart and awarded myself lots of stars for tasks accomplished everyday. But basically the things which I continued to do even without a star were those which energised me, brought enjoyment, caused enthusiasm. No chart was needed for them.

Re-reading children’s literature. Walking in beautiful countryside. Seeing my family.

And reading the Bible in a year – which I have accomplished this year because a friend recommended a great way to do it. Guthrie’s Chronological Reading of God’s Story -  I have enjoyed and appreciated the overview and the thoughts and the questions and also that it’s 6 days a week so there was always a catch-up day if I needed it.

And it’s on my Kindle, so it was easy to take with me to read wherever I am. It too brought enjoyment and enthusiasm.

So why not make my Resolutions things I know I will enjoy, things which energise and enthuse me?

I will walk every day. Easier too now I have a puppy dog!

I will have a date night with my husband once a week.

I will re-read a favourite book on alternate months.

I will have a long warm bubble-bath occasionally and read in the bath!

I will nourish my soul – for me, that means short meaningful Scripture passages to read, times of silence and reflection, prayer walks. Each of those regularly; but not necessarily every day. What will be constant is connecting to God, building my relationship with Him.

Why punish myself or set myself up for failure with a long list of things I don’t really want to do? Why not plan to do what energises, encourages, enthuses - for then I feel better and only then will I be able to tackle some of the areas that formerly would have comprised the Resolution lists.

I shall keep my new year’s resolutions: because they are the very things I want to do. In fact, I am looking forward to them. So I shall start now. I’m off to nourish my soul.

 

What helps you to keep your Resolutions?

What will energise and enthuse and encourage you, so that you are able to tackle the less liked areas?

Share this blog with your friends and find out their Resolutions too?

And check back in a couple of days to read the next January instalment - why not sign up right now, so you don't miss it, and have it delivered to your email inbox.

 

 

 

I'm in an impossible mess. I need a Messiah

Photo from A Holy Experience  - Ann Voskamp

"It's a remarkable thing that you have been given to do - and also understandable in the light of all that you both - and perhaps especially Penelope - has been through.

Let us believe that the power and plan of heaven itself is in this prospect, and that you are going to receive every encouragement and resource available to see its accomplishment."

 

So wrote a wonderful older clergyman to us just a few days ago. And our hearts cried out yes, we want to believe that.

But crazy have been the past weeks and months. Our faith that we are called to this, our patience in the waiting, our trust that God can make it happen, have all been severely tested and tried. So we have been to our wits end. I think almost literally for Kim, my husband, dealing with mortgage lenders and solicitors and planning permission officers and insurance brokers and bank managers. (let alone coping with a demanding large church and now the Christmas season) It's over three months since our low offer ( see the story here: www.ministriesbydesign.org/excitingnews all change) was accepted and our excitement levels nearly exploded.

But life happened. Things took place - or didn't when they should have. The mortgage offer was withdrawn, delayed, reassessed, remeasured, re-offered. And lowered. Considerably.

We had to make the decision to sell our beloved South Carolina home as well as the London flat (which too has taken over three months to exchange since offer agreement) and the Bolt Hole. The Bolt Hole was withdrawn from the market - no one wanted it.

But the Lord did - He knew we would need it to live in while Mays Farm is being renovated.

And through it all, personal stresses and illnesses. I spent two hours on Saturday morning being assessed  by an independent Consultant Psychotherapist for the insurance claims. It was exhausting, draining, emotional. It almost knocked me out for the rest of the weekend.

What can I learn through all of this? For none of it is life threatening, none of it comes near to the horrors of the shooting in Connecticut and what those families are suffering. My salvation is not affected either.

Then today, an email from Michael Hyatt listing all he has being going through over the past week or two. And so I know I am not alone in the daily demands of every day life. He lists what he has learnt and it resonates with me:

 

My Take Away

So in the midst of this, I don’t have any big life lessons, other than to lean into what I know to be true:

                  God loves me.

                  This too will pass.

                  Be grateful—if not for all things then in all things.

                  Do the next right thing.

                  Don’t push myself too hard.

                  Get plenty of rest.

                  Prayer matters.

Yes. Yes, I echo, these are my takeaways too.

So I know I need every encouragement and resource. And where do I find them?

In the Messiah - who comes into these impossible messes and makes miracles happen. Even with mortgages and exchanges and buying and selling; even with a car which today needs a miracle too.

In time for Christmas?

Even so, come Lord Jesus.

NEW PILGRIMAGE IN TUSCANY summer 2013

NEW FOR 2013 - Italian Pilgrimages
San g path
San Gimignano
VFmap
Canterbury to Rome
via f pilgrim
Via Francegina
Siena
Siena
Mays Farm MAYS FARMRead more
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BOOKING
If you are interested in coming on one of the walks, please email us for full details and a booking form. To reserve your place there is a deposit of £200 with the balance due 8 weeks prior to the Pilgrimage.  Places are limited to just 10 people maximum (plus us) so don't delay!
Please pray for us as we put this together; and pray about whether you might be able to come. Do feel free to contact us with any questions regarding the walk. We are so excited about this opportunity and really hope you might be able to join us; and do pass the details on to others you know who might like to come too.

 

Grace and peace,
warmly,
Kim and Penelope

 

Ministries By Design
Mays Farm, Hullavington
Walking the Via Francegina
San G framed

We are excited to be sending you the details for the first of our new pilgrimage retreats - in Tuscany, next June and September. As you know, Penelope has been leading Pilg
rimages on the Cotswold Way for many years and many women have appreciated that opportunity. But now Kim will be joining her in leading retreats and walks for both sexes, for singles and for marrieds  - and we
want you to have the opportunity to come too!
QUESTIONS? call us, we'd love to chat with you!
UK: 07870 497365 (NOT Dec 28 - Jan 21)
USA: (Dec 29 - Jan 21) : 843 325 5220
fresco
The Via Francegina
This old pilgrim route goes from Canterbury, England, all the way to Rome. Archbishop Sigericus of Canterbury walked it in 994, and wrote down the names of the places he'd passed through. The route has been recreated so that you can follow in the footsteps of thousands of pilgrims over the centuries who have walked these ancient footpaths. You will be walking through the gorgeous countryside of Tuscany; as you walk there will be time to reflect, to seek the Lord, to have time away from the busyness of everyday life. But with Kim there too it won't be silent all the way!! And each evening there will be devotional times led by Kim and/or Penelope.
You will walk each day, but your bags will be magically taken on to the next hotel where we will all have dinner together in the evenings, and you will have many opportunities for tasting local wines and foods.
The route is stunningly beautiful - we have already walked it and just loved it. From the ancient hill top villages to the refreshingly cool Roman-built swimming pool to achingly beautiful old churches and fabulous gelato .... this is a glorious opportunity for you to experience a vacation with a difference.
The vacation will be organised by Alternative Travel Group and you can look on their website for further information about the walks. ATG journey
However, all your bookings and payments will be done through Ministries By Design, so that it is very easy for you - we will do all the admin!
courtyard

       Dates:
       There is a choice of dates:
       June 23 - 3
       Sept 7 - 14
       This is an 8 day holiday. We arrive on          day 1, walk from San Gimignano to              Montalcino over the next 6 days and            leave on day 8.
       COST - £1395 (HalfBoard)
 
       All costs are per person, sharing a twin        bedded room with private bathroom            facilities.
You will need to arrange your own flights to Italy (Pisa airport is recommended but Rome works too), local travel to San Gimignano and from Montalcino and also your own travel insurance.  Other extras are any drinks you require with dinner, and provisions/snacks for lunch each day. Everything else is included, which makes it incredibly good value.
Once you have booked,  we will send you the full details including what to bring with you, and how to prepare for this walk - physically and spiritually!

 

 

 

Hilltop town
Do please pray for us as we begin this new season of our lives and ministries. We will be leaving London on December 25 (yes, really!) and will be renovating Mays Farm for the next few months. We hope to have the Retreat House ready later summer 2013 - more news on all of that later, but you can read more about it in the link "Read More" on the left!

QUESTION TIME for Advent

I preached yesterday at all three of our main services at St James - on the first Sunday of Advent. Several people asked for copies of my sermon - so here is my script for those who would like to be reminded of something from it. The audio edition will very soon be available here: http://www.st-james.org.uk/sermons.php

 

ANY QUESTIONS?

-       comment on difficulty in finding something to wear this morning, getting following photos of Sally Hitchener in The Times yesterday …

-        PRAY……

-       INTRODUCTION:

Today: the first Sunday in Advent.  We’ve just lit the candle of HOPE

And so Christmas is beginning…the season when so many superficial wants get confused with the deeper longings of the human heart.

When giving the latest techno-toy gets confused with giving love.

When the frenzied scramble for that perfect gift at the lowest possible price takes over our thinking and leaves very little room for the theme of Advent, for preparing for the coming King.

But this season of Advent calls us—in the midst of so much distraction—to pay attention to the deeper desires of our hearts.

So this morning I want to look at three questions which I hope will help us over the weeks of Advent. Each question comes from the first chapter of Luke’s Gospel and I want to look at each in turn, and then think about how it applies to us in our own situations.

-       About how each question will help us to go deeper into God in order to satisfy the deepest longings of our hearts, in a way that the consumerist frenzy of our modern Christmas never can.

-       About HOPE – as we wait for the coming of the Messiah, King Jesus  who is the hope of the world.

So -  3 Questions: and I am indebted to Tim Clayton’s new little book on the Four Questions of Advent for the idea for this sermon today.

- The question of disappointment, asked by Zechariah

- The question of inadequacy, asked by Elizabeth

- The question of surrender, asked by Mary

1.  THE  QUESTION OF DISAPPOINTMENT

Luke begins his story of God’s presence coming to live among us with this surprising account of Zechariah.

A man who was living a life of great disappointment: in his work and in his marriage.

He was a priest, one of the leaders of the people, and they had been expecting the Messiah to come. There was great disappointment and frustration that not only was there no messiah, there was the Roman invasion and so they were occupied by foreign forces. He had had no good news at work to be able to share, no hope to offer to others.

Z also had great disappointment in his marriage.  Most men want to son to carry on their family name, to be proud of and bring up. And in those days, to be a childless couple was to be a laughing stock, second class citizens almost. Z & E had had no child, in spite of their prayers, and Z was a man disappointed in his marriage.

How many of us know deep disappointments in life – in our careers, in our family life, in our homes, in almost every area of our lives?

Here is a husband who had been crying out to God in desperation,

a wounded, hopeless man;

one whose work has not been all that he had hoped,

one whose marriage had not been all that he had  hoped.

And I suspect for most of us here, there are things in Z’s disappointments  that we relate to in our own lives, whether we are male or female, married or single.

We have known deep disappointments in our lives -

- Relationships which cause hurt and anguish and intense sadness

- Work situations and frustrations causing stress and  hurt and disappointments

- Lack of money and security

- poor health or persistent pain

- the general pursuit of happiness.

 

We are Broken and Bruised and Battered people.

 

Maybe we feel we have cried out to the Lord and he hasn’t heard our anguish.

Just like Zechariah, who had tried to live a good life according to God’s laws (v 7) maybe we feel it’s too late  - they were getting old, maybe they were tempted to give up.

Someone once said that the words “TOO LATE” are the saddest words ever. And maybe that’s how you feel too.  It’s too late; there have been too many disappointments. Maybe that’s going round in your head right now.

But let’s look at bit more at this story of Zechariah. For something is about to change in his life. Suddenly, after years and years of hopelessness both at work and in his personal life, something happens.

Something happens at work: he is chosen, he won the privilege, of being promoted for this one- off event of offering the evening incense, something a priest typically only did once in his lifetime, as once you had done it you were ineligible to be entered into the draw until all the priests in your division (and there were a great many) had done it, and your division was only eligible twice a year for a week at a time in any case.

So Zechariah goes into the special area in the Temple, offers the incense and as he does so, he has this vision of an angel – who turns out of course as we know with hindsight, to be an archangel. The archangel wants to calm Z – don’t be afraid – and give him some good news.

‘Your prayers have been heard.”  And there is the amazing news of a son for Z and his wife Elizabeth – a son who is to be called John: which means “GOD HAS GIVEN GRACE.”

But I suspect Z didn’t really hear it all – didn’t take it all in. Even though something is going to change in his personal life, he is so stunned, so overwhelmed, that he misses God’s promises.  Maybe he allows his disappointments and broken hopes to get in the way; he is so used to feeling disappointed, let down by God and by everything else in his life, that he doesn’t really understand what’s going on.

And so he asks the wrong question, a question coming out of disappointment. HOW CAN I KNOW? He is disappointed and hurt, and he can’t get beyond that. Even when confronted with this messenger from God, with this astonishing and very surprising vision, it’s almost as if he voices his frustrations. How can I KNOW? It can’t be true! It’s just not possible.

Z has spoken from his heart, from a place of disappointment and hurt. But he has overreached himself. And so God puts him in a place of reflection for a while – by making him dumb, so that he would not be able to do his work, not be able to take services or talk to others. Maybe the silence, the reflection, is so that there can be time for renewal and refreshment.

Because the answer to Z’s disappointments is coming:

HOPE is coming:

first in the son he is to have,

who will then point the way to the true HOPE:

Jesus, the Messiah and the hope of the nations. Jesus, the hope of heaven, coming to lift us from our hurts and disappointments.

INTO THE MIDDLE OF OUR IMPOSSIBLE MESSES COMES THE MESSIAH WHO MAKE MIRACLES HAPPEN (from Anne Voskamp)

How can I KNOW?  Is this a question we also would have asked, or do ask in our own circumstances, when we sense the movement of God in our lives – or long to do so? That deep longing to KNOW that God is real, that he has plans for us, that the pain of disappointment and hurt will one day be gone?

Because don’t you find that there is always the temptation to try to work things out for ourselves,

to ask WHY so loudly and with such heartache,

that even if the answer should come, we’d not be able to  pick it up?

Like Z, to ask the wrong question?

And so our first questioner, Zechariah, perhaps speaks to us in our disappointment, and suggests to us that we should take a period of reflection, maybe during this first week of Advent coming up;

- take some time in quiet before the Lord, and ask Him to speak  to us, to speak into our lost hope and our pain;

- and maybe to expect him to again, in a way we’ve not known  certainly for a long time, perhaps not ever.

We need to whisper, like Samuel: Speak Lord for your servant is listening.

Is that something you need to whisper out of your hurt and disappointment over this next week? And will you stay quiet long enough to hear what the Lord has to say? Because with God, it’s never too late; in the presence of God, maybe our hurts and fears and disappointments look very different. Can you offer them to him, knowing that he will say “Don’t be afraid” and that he will have the best solution: the hope we can have in Jesus.

2. THE QUESTION OF INADEQUACY

Let’s move on to the second question, the question of inadequacy.

Moving on just over 6 months, to verse 39. Z’s wife Elizabeth is now 6 months pregnant, and has an unexpected visitor – her young cousin, Mary, who is also pregnant  - with the Messiah, of course, but we will look at Mary and her question in a little more detail in a moment.

Mary has struggled on a long arduous journey, probably whilst trying to cope with morning sickness and all those first strange early week of pregnancy. As she arrives at long last in Elizabeth’s house, and steps at last over the doorstep, tired and weary and yet strangely exhilarated with all that is happening, something wonderful happens.  Elizabeth’s baby, the promised John whose name means GOD HAS GIVEN GRACE, ‘leaps in the womb’ – v 41.

Now most babies are fairly active in the womb – by about 6 months into the pregnancy they are kicking and turning, getting hiccups and making their presence felt.  So in some respects what Elizabeth feels is normal.  AND YET!

In the original text, the word used for ‘leaped” is used only in this one place in the New Testament. It is the word used to describe great energy and joy, and was used in the book of Malachi to describe the energy and joy which will follow the coming of the Messiah.

In Malachi 4: 2 the prophecy reads: “But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness shall rise, with healing in his wings. You shall go out leaping like calves from the stall.”

This was a special moment, and Elizabeth recognized it as such. Verse 42 In a loud voice she exclaimed: ‘Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the child you will bear!  But why am I so favoured, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? 

Elizabeth gives a loud cry of joy – but then comes her question, and its heartfelt profundity seems to be lost in translation in the NIV which we have in front of us.

Zechariah’s question was sceptical, a sort of ‘prove it to me’ kind of question.  Elizabeth’s cry of joy is followed by a pause and then a question of self doubt, which literally says in the original, “Why has this happened to me, that the mother of my Lord comes EVEN TO ME?”

She is basically saying, WHY ME? WHO AM I that this should happen to me? I’m not the priest like my husband, I’m no-one special, I’m just the stay at home housewife up in the hills. I don’t deserve this.

I’m no-one special.

And itsn’t that the lie that the enemy feeds into each one of us at times?

That moment of self doubt,

that lack of self worth,

that low self-esteem.

I’m no-one special.

Someone else is smarter

Someone else has not made all those wrong decisions

Someone else is more vivacious, more patient,

more clever

or younger or better looking  – or, or, or

Poor self esteem, often through comparing ourselves with others.

Here is Elizabeth, wondering why on earth God would choose her. And so again, the question comes off the page and engages each one of us, whatever our situation, whatever our role in life, however slight or mundane it seems.  We too often struggle with this very question.

Surely God would never want me. Surely God would never choose me.  My ministry is no good, I never help people, I’m wasting my time.

All those self doubts, all those moments of low self esteem, all those moments of wondering whether I have anything at all to offer. Why should God choose me?

And yet -  He does. He chooses each one of us for the role He has determined before our birth for each one of us.  But, even more than that, there is his love for each one of us.

Our eldest granddaughter had her fourth birthday last week.  She celebrated with a Hallo Kitty birthday party. (For those who don’t’ know, Hallo Kitty is a slightly nauseating, very pinkly coloured, cartoon-like character who for some reason appeals enormously to little girls).  At the party, there were hallo kitty masks to colour in and wear, hallo kitty face painting, lots of pink things – and hallo kitty transfers to be put on to the back of one’s hand.

And so I told Talitha, my granddaughter, when she was proudly showing me her hallo kitty transfer on her hands and arms, that God loves her so much he has a transfer with her name on it on his hand. Only that transfer wont wash off, like the hallo kitty ones.  The transfer with her name on it which is on God’s hand is permanent, and it’s because he loves her so much and wants to wear her name on his hand forever.

You know that’s true for you too, don’t you! God has your name engraved on his hand because he loves you so much  - it says so in Isaiah 49:

V 14 But Zion said, ‘The Lord has forsaken me, 
the Lord has forgotten me.’

in other words, who am I?

self doubt, thinking the Lord doesn’t care.

But what does God say to us?

v15  ‘Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
 and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
 Though she may forget,

I will not forget you!  See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;

That’s what God does to prove his love for you, his unending, faithful, trustworthy love for you.  You are so special, so loved by God, that in the word of the song,

There is nothing you can do to make him love you more

There is nothing you can do to make him love you less.

God loves you.

That makes you special.

No matter who you are, no matter what you have done, no matter what you look like or feel like.

God loves you and you are special. And he proves his love to you in this : he sent Jesus. The promised messiah, the hope of the world.

Romans 5:8
But God demonstrates (or proves) his own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. THAT’S HOW MUCH GOD LOVES YOU.

And so the challenge for the second week of Advent is for us to think more deeply about

WHO AM I?

and for that thinking to take us deeper into knowing the truth of how much God loves us.

We don’t have to feel inadequate or compare ourselves to others.  We have instead to live in this truth: how very very much God loves you.

HE LOVES YOU. You are a child of God.

 

3.  THE THIRD QUESTION OF TOTAL SURRENDER

And so we move on to the third question, one which I am going to look at in very much less detail although in fact it is probably the most important one.  And that’s Mary’s question, when she is told that she is going to be the mother of the Messiah, the hope of the world.  We’ll look at it more briefly for two reasons – one is that you want to get home for lunch, the other is because I preached at St James about Mary’s surrender to God not so very long ago, and you may remember or you may want to listen to it online.

Go back to Luke 1: 26.  It’s a story we all know so very well. A story of a young girl who is engaged to be married, and of how she is met by an angel, how the angel tells her that she will find herself pregnant and how the baby will be a miracle from God.

Maybe you too have had an experience which has been out of your normal comfort zone, when you have been asked to do something which has been scary but also a great privilege.  Of course, it’s a very small and totally inadequate illustration of what Mary the mother of Jesus was faced with.

Picture from Spoleto: God tapping Mary on the shoulder:

And what was Mary’s response to this invitation?

V 29 Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be.

A better translation might be, Mary was confused and worried and tried to think what the angel could mean.

So she is thinking deeply about this, trying to work it out, as the angel goes on to tell her what is going to happen. Don’t be frightened, the angel says, God has it all worked out.

And then, in v 34, Mary replies,  ‘How will this be, since I am a virgin?’   -   How can I have a baby?  I’m a virgin!

Unlike Zechariah, Mary’s curiosity as to how God would act was genuine.   Most importantly, her immediate reaction was one of total obedience.  What would happen to her would cause her to be misunderstood and probably chastised and ridiculed by her family and her friends, as it would look as if she had had sex outside marriage, an offence punishable by death.  This could jeopardise her marriage, or any future marriage possibilities, and make her an outcast. But she didn’t hesitate to be used by God in whatever way he asked of her: -

V 38  It comes across as an immediate decision; she may have been bewildered, she may have been anxious; but she was content to leave it to God and be open to his will.  “I am the Lord’s servant,” she said, “and I am willing to accept whatever he wants.  May everything you have said come true.” (NLT)

OK, God, whatever you want, whatever you say.  Full and glad surrender, at any cost.

Isn’t this the most powerful example of complete trust in God and obedience to his plans?

“Here I am, the servant of the Lord. Let it be to me according to your word.”

And so here is the challenge for each one of us for the third week of Advent. To spend time bringing our impossible situations to God, and asking him to work it all out; to offer him ourselves, knowing that he can, will, and does do all things well. (as it says in Mark 7:37)

From the moment she accepted God’s plans and will for her life, Mary was totally dependent on him.  She opened herself to God in every way; and gave him complete control.  The only thing she could control was her faithfulness to God, her dependency on him.

But God – don’t you just love that phrase?  But God… we do this and we do that, and we mess up, and whatever.  But God.. God did what only he could do and he poured out his spirit over Mary.  “The Holy Spirit will come upon you and the power of the Most High will overshadow you, “ the angel had promised. (v. 35).  And Mary knew that God had not forgotten his promise (v54 NLT).  She was filled with Spirit, overshadowed by the power of God.

Mary embraced God’s will so completely, that she doesn’t question him, his ways or his plans.  And this I think is the real challenge of this story.

Not only was Mary in a relationship with God to the extent that he cherished her and chose her;

not only was she filled with power from on high so that his plans and promises permeated through her to the whole of history;

but she was totally surrendered to what he wanted.

Full and glad surrender at any cost.

IS that true of you and of me? Are we totally surrendered to God? And if that is the only question you remember from this sermon, if that is the only question you take with you into Advent and then Christmas this year, it is the most important and fundamental question of all.

Will you allow God to have all of you,

your disappointments and hurts,

your self doubts and fears,

your lack of love and your questions and fears?

Will you hand it all over to him and give him yourself?

Because only when we do that, as Mary did, can God pour his Spirit over us and fill us with Himself.

Mary, who was probably young and poor, who came from insignificant Nazareth and had nothing to offer except herself and her full and glad surrender at any cost, surrendered herself utterly and completely to God’s call on her life. She trusted him and obeyed him. And because of her faith and her trust and obedience, God could use her and through her bless the whole of human kind. . Full and glad surrender at any cost. She wanted “God’s will, nothing more, nothing less, nothing else.”

CONCLUSION

What is your question as you wait for Christmas? Whatever your situation, whatever your disappointments or your inadequacies, there is hope.

By surrendering ourselves to God, the One who loves us best,

we can know new hope, new love.

We can know His deep deep love for us as we look at his king size bed, and

And know that He IS the answer to each and every one of our questions.

 

Will you stand ….  Pray maybe with hands open to showing offering of self to the Lord …

 

There is a hope that burns within my heart

That gives me strength for every passing day

A glimpse of glory now revealed in meagre part

Yet drives all doubt away

I stand in Christ with sins forgiven

And Christ in me the hope of heaven

My highest calling and my deepest joy

To make his will my home.

 

 - Stuart Townend