Feeling like Barbara Woodhouse - or God

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As you may have seen recently, there is a new member of our household. Gracie arrived on Saturday, a tiny scrap of 8 week old labrador puppy. She is asleep on my feet as I type. A gift to us as we leave this ministry and move on to a new one, she brings lots of love  - and lots of hard work! Yesterday, I signed an email to a friend "yours from the puddles and poos."  I rush around with kitchen towel, Mr Muscle and Vanish. An added problem is that I can't let her go into the Vicarage garden - she has yet to have her next inoculations, and we have a brood of foxes in the wilderness at the bottom of the garden, who leave their trademarks all over the grass. North London is full of vermin-laden foxes and rats, so no outdoor activity until injections+2 weeks.  Indoor litter trays seem odd for a labrador. And as I begin to talk to Gracie and 'suggest' various activities, I can hear the stentorian tones of Barbara Woodhouse in my voice, that legendary dog trainer on television, with her emphasis on 'Sittttttttt' and Walk - eeeeeeeees!'  I have yet to don a kilt.

But I can also see me and God in the way that Gracie and I interact. Gracie is totally dependent on me - for everything. Sometimes she runs away from me, sometimes she comes rushing towards me. I love her - unconditionally , in spite of having to clear up after her. A lot.

I know that God loves me like that; unconditionally. In spite of all the messes I create in my life  (figuratively speaking you understand) and all the clearing up and sorting out he has to do for me.  Sometimes I run away from him. Sometimes I rush towards him. HE still looks out for me -  he is El Roi, the God who sees me, wherever I am, whatever my circumstances. (Genesis 16)      I am learning from my little puppy.  One day, I pray that she will be a help and comfort to those who come to The Vine at Mays Farm.

 

When have you known God as El Roi, the God who sees?

 

 

 

 

 

Prayer changes things. Or so I always thought.

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"How is the house?" Friends are kind to ask. " Is it yours yet?"

Well, no. No yet. We can't believe how long it takes to buy a house. Or sell a flat.

Or is it just us? Even our broker is amazed - and has lodged a formal complaint with whoever-it-is. And I chastise myself: I haven't prayed enough. I haven't offered the whole project up to the Lord every moment of every day of every week. I rather thought I had done that. And I'd moved on. My mind is busy with what will happen once the project is up and running. Thinking and praying about the Retreats and the Retreatants, about how I want to spoil them with breakfast in bed, plenty of time and space to connect with God, beautiful unexpected corners  inside the house and out. Who might come? Whoever they may be, Lord will you bless them.  Bless the house and bless the farm and bless the village. Make The Vine a blessing to all those who hear of it, come to it, retreat at it.

But in the meantime, it still isn't ours. We have yet to exchange a contract, in spite of the numerous pieces of paper which have been pushed at me to sign. In spite of the wonderful plans the architect has sent off to the Planning Office. In spite of the Aga sitting waiting to go into the fabulous kitchen which has been designed for me. And in spite of the fact that we leave St James in just 43 days. (I know, because I always have a count down to Christmas Day on my laptop. I love Christmas.)

And so I am thrown back on to God's mercy and grace. We can't make this happen at the right time.

But He can. And He knows the right timing. Can I trust him to do this at the right time?

I know I should pray and then leave it in God's hands - I've done that already for this place. and I know that prayer changes things. Or so I always thought. But now a new idea occurs to me - seeps into my mind, maybe gently prompted by the Holy Spirit. Look at 1 Peter 5.  That verse. The one about casting all your cares on to Him. So I look it up, remind myself afresh. And see what comes before that phrase.

So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor.Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. 1 Peter 5:6-7. (NLT)

Humble yourself under the mighty power of God. At the right time. And then it will be for HIS honour.

And the image in my mind is of casting, throwing, laying out. Myself on the floor in front of the Throne of Grace. My worries at His feet. I have been  reminded that my worrying and my anxiety and my frustrations help no one, not me and not this project. Only God. Only God can do it at the right time. He's already poured out blessing upon blessing upon brokenness. He's shown that He can make things happen.

Might you too join us in praying for this project, in the spirit of 1 Peter 5:6-7? It would be a blessing for us and I think for you too. Thank you.

 

 All images courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

A NEW LIVING LEGACY

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  Fitzroy Square. Cream buildings, a veritable heritage

.

Leaves swirling, greyly autumn.

Blue plaques on walls to mark the homes of famous men and women.

I look and read and try to imagine this or that person living in this space, looking out of that window, watching these trees shed their leaves. A blue plaque as living legacy, reminder of who they were, what they did, the length of their stay.

And I think of my legacy. What will I leave? Who would want to remember me?

My children, offspring from our marriage, carried in my heart and on my hip for so  long, and now carried simply in my heart -  as they carry their own on hip and in heart.

They will remember.  But what will they remember; and their children, my  grandchildren, and perhaps their children too.  What will they remember of me? What  will they remember me for?

And the only thing I want for my legacy is that it should be my prayers for them.  Prayers reaching down through the generations, unto the third and fourth generation. To pray for my children, for their children and their children’s children.  For them and their spouses and their children’s children to be those who love the Lord, who live for  Him and give their all for Him.

I think of my legacy; and think, hope, pray, that it’s not too late, that there is time for the prayer to continue and to reach forward into the future, their future.

So I slow down, walking more slowly, taking time to look at the blue plaques, praying for those precious descendants. And I want more time; time to pray. I want time to slow and allow me moments more in prayer, moments to talk to my offspring, to tell them what’s really important to me. To whisper His story to my grandchildren and great-grandchildren, tell them of the Lord’s great love for them and of mine too, a shadow of His.

My footsteps carry me on and Fitzroy Square is behind.  I quicken, conscious of dawdling, hurrying once again to the time-busyness of busy London around me. Yet deep inside I know: my legacy has time to deepen and develop.  I need not hurry on.  This one race is not the one I want to win – there’s no prize for being the first over the finishing line of life.

Instead, God grant me the time to pray it forward, tell it to my descendants, live it out the best I can for them.

“And I will pour out my Spirit on your descendants,
and my blessing on your children.
They will thrive like watered grass,
like willows on a riverbank.
 Some will proudly claim, ‘I belong to the Lord.’
 Others will say, ‘I am a descendant of Jacob.’
 Some will write the Lord’s name on their hands
 and will take the name of Israel as their own.”         ISAIAH 44:3-5 (NLT)

WHAT LEGACY WOULD YOU LIKE TO LEAVE?

WHAT WILL YOU HOPE YO BE REMEMBERED FOR?

 

 

 

 

 

1 WAY TO FIND THE POWER

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We went to see Chariots of Fire last night, on stage. If you haven't been - go! It is amazing. Spellbinding. Uplifting and inspirational.  We were the only two people in the front row (cheaper seats, you had to crane your neck - but we are both tall so it was no problem!) And so my husband was handed a pair of cymbals at the start of the second Act - and had a crashingly enjoyable 5 minutes.

And we all know the story:  how one man stood by his principles, even when his beloved sister and then his team leaders and even the Prince of Wales, asked him to give in just this once - for King and Country. And how he remained steadfast.

The production has been much talked about - how the actors have to run so hard, so fast, around the circular track in the auditorium. We felt exhausted after just a few minutes of watching it all! But by the time we had sat through the whole play (musical? show? ) we felt proud to be Christian, proud to be British, proud of King and country. It was inspirational.

For once, Christianity was not derided, sidelined, undermined or mocked.

For once, the Christian was held up as a hero.

His rival and team mate, Harold Abrahams, was quoted as saying, "I am faster. But he is better."

Eric Liddell was voted as Scotland's favourite sports star over a century after his death. Yet he died in obscurity as a prisoner of war in a concentration camp, having spent his relatively short life as a missionary.

David Puttnam, the producer of the 1981 film, said of Eric Liddell, "Everything I have read makes clear the depth of Eric Lidell's personal commitment: the degree to which his beliefs formed him -  and his desire to bring them into EVERY aspect of his life."

Eric Liddell left an enormous legacy.  A commitment to God, a passion for living life in God's ways, a firmness in his desire for wanting only to be firm in his beliefs and faith. He said,

"You came to see a race today. To see someone win. It happened to be me. But I want you to do more than just watch a race. I want you to take part in it. I want to compare faith to running in a race. It's hard. It requires concentration of will, energy of soul. You experience elation when the winner breaks the tape - especially if you've got a bet on it. But how long does that last? You go home. Maybe you're dinner's burnt. Maybe you haven't got a job. So who am I to say, "Believe, have faith," in the face of life's realities? I would like to give you something more permanent, but I can only point the way. I have no formula for winning the race. Everyone runs in her own way, or his own way. And where does the power come from, to see the race to its end? From within. Jesus said, "Behold, the Kingdom of God is within you. If with all your hearts, you truly seek me, you shall ever surely find me." If you commit yourself to the love of Christ, then that is how you run a straight race. "

In Paris, on the very Sunday when Eric Liddell was meant to be running in an Olympic heat, he was preaching in church. Isaiah 40: they shall run and not be weary'; they shall walk and not faint.

May that be true for you and me today - and tomorrow and all our tomorrows. To run, wholeheartedly and with passion and a sense of calling and adventure, with God's power within us, until we break the finishing tape.

 

 

WHY I AM GLAD FOR RAIN TODAY

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"God sent a rain today

to show how miracles are made.

The trees and grasses looked and listened,

the hills did likewise.

Only man put up his umbrella -and grumbled and grumbled." - anon.

 

But I was determined to walk again this morning, in spite of the heavy rain. I donned wellies and raincoat, set off for Ally Pally, put up my umbrella.

It was wholly and completely different to yesterday. Then, the sun shone warm on my face, the sky blue to my gaze. The crowds were out, taking gentle exercise on a pleasant autumnal Sunday morning.

I dodged through groups of runners and cyclists, passed the greyhound owners club as they lined up their dogs, stepped out of the way of Bugaboo mummies as they hurtled their offspring along the footpaths. All around me was noise - dogs and babies, shouts and song, a veritable Babel of  mid-European languages (and occasionally some English.)

In spite of the crowding, I tried to listen for the Lord's voice, to find Him in the walking and rhythming of my pace. I laughed at the sun and gloried in the warmth and rejoiced in the time away from family and friends for a while. Round and up and down and round, until 12,000 steps registered.  Then I left the trees and the grasses to the people, whose Palace apparently it is.

Today, there was no-one. Just me and my umbrella, the rain and the falling leaves. And God. In the silence of the falling rain there was just Him and me. No other distractions. No dogs or people, no babies or Babel. I splashed in a puddle, gloried in the autumn colours still radiant in the rain.

And wondered afresh at the contrast. In the rain, the gloom, the damp, it was easier to listen to the Lord. No other joyful distractions.

I thought again of the gratitude in the brokenness, of the eucharistic moment of giving thanks when the bread is broken, of the miracle that comes from much brokenness.  It was hard to hear Him in the happiness of the Indian summer; in the rain and aloneness, He seemed much nearer.

Had you offered me a choice, I would have chosen sunshine over shadow, richness over rain. But I would have missed God's voice.

I am glad I walked again today. It was a Retreat: under my umbrella was God - with me.

When God drills deep, He always strikes a fresh new spring.

 

Over to you - when do you find it easiest to listen to the Lord, to hear that still small voice?

 

Can I live by faith? The first hurdle arrives.

in , ,

The initial excitement of finding a house that can be our family home as well as provide a place of peace and sanctuary for others has lasted for a while! Feeling called by God to pursue that dream is exhilarating. If you missed the 'formal announcement', you can find it here.

And for a while we have known blessing upon blessing. Not just that the sellers chose us in spite of ours being the lowest offer; or our London flat going under offer within a few days for more than we had imagined it might be worth; or the sense of the house being the 'right' place every time we walk in.  But more than all those, the 'sixth sense' type of feeling or knowing, that deep imponderable, that the Lord is in this and is making it happen.

So we smiled and accepted the most amazing offers of help - this person doing all the legal work to set up the charitable Trust for us, that kitchen design person offering their services for free, this one who knows how to get grants for insulation doing the ground work, that one offering to put together a little group of initial donors to the Trust. And the kind comments, tweets, emails, letters, cards -  from friends and acquaintances, family and congregation - the sense everyone has that this is 'right,' this is what we are meant to be doing. And people we haven't even met offering to come and be praying labourers when we need them; a member of a youth group we ran 30 years ago writing out of the blue offering to come and help. The couple we asked to be Chairperson and first trustee of the board saying yes  .... blessing upon blessing. And we can't quite believe it's all happening and that there are less than 90 days until we leave the church here.

But.

And there was bound to be a first but.

The mortgage company we used for the London apartment have refused to 'port' the mortgage. We hadn't counted on that. We took out that mortgage years ago when we were first in the States, both of us on the generous salaries that clergy there often enjoy. Now we are stepping out into the unknown, really living by faith as we take on this new project;  there is no provable  income in the future. The mortgage company don't like that!

So here is the first stumbling block.

Can I trust the Lord in this? Do I believe He can sort it out? And if I say, yes I do - do I mean it or is it just that I can hide behind my husband knowing that he is making phone calls and filling in forms and doing his best to find a new mortgage provider?

Because if I can't trust now, if I can't keep praying AND trusting, in this first hurdle, what of the next? And the next?

So here is my prayer request:

Will you pray with us that the Lord will indeed provide what is needed?

That we will learn to trust in God's provision and God's timing?

 

Listen to these children singing one of my favourite songs from Isaiah, a song we sang a lot on the first Cotswold Pilgrimage; click on the link for the music to play while you continue reading:

Surely, it is God who saves me; 
I will trust in him and not be afraid.

For the Lord is my stronghold and my sure defense, and he will be my Savior.

Therefore you shall draw water with rejoicing 
from the springs of salvation.

And on that day you shall say, 
Give thanks to the Lord and call upon his Name;

Make his deeds known among the peoples; see that they remember that his Name is exalted.

Sing the praises of the Lord, for he has done great things, and this is known in all the world.

Cry aloud, inhabitants of Zion, ring out your joy, for the great one in the midst of you is the Holy One of Israel.

(Canticle 9 The Song of Isaiah)  

Attempt something so great for God that it be doomed to failure unless God be in it.

 

 

Much loved stairs

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Stairs

Old stairs, worn and caressed by the feet of centuries, nibbled by a worm or a beetle, twisting up to attics of memories and rafters.

I love them already. Soon, they will be the stairs of my new home, leading me up and on, a promise of things to come, places to be, excitements of exploration.

Representation of an incline, a tread, to things as yet unknown. Warm to my touch in the late summer sunshine, enticing me upwards, onwards. Following the One who walks ahead, one step at a time.

To a place of His glory, His choosing.

"I do not know what lies ahead, the way I cannot see

But One stands near to be my guide, He'll show the way to me.

I know who holds the future and He holds it in HIs hands.

With God things don't just happen, everything by Him is planned.

So as I face the future, with its problems large and small

I'll trust the God of miracles, give to Him my all."

- Eugene Clark

Exciting news: ALL CHANGE!

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Mays Farmhouse, Hullavington

Well - take a deep breath; and go make a cup of tea.  RIGHT NOW ……. OK? Sitting down? Here goes:

 

Our whole future has been changed in a whirlwind just these past few weeks.  We will be leaving London and all its painful associations just after Christmas. There; I've said it; and the lovely church family at St James have been told today. It's official!

 

As you know we are both somewhat bruised from the tragedies and upheavals of the past few years and in particular I have had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, following the awful accident in which I saw my mother die. The constant London sirens, blaring up and down the Muswell Hill Broadway just by our house have brought so many moments of terrible flashback, and we were advised some time ago to consider moving. A few months ago we both strongly felt the Lord say that it was time we were to begin pushing doors to see where He would lead us and what we would be doing.

 

We have indeed pushed a few doors, but nothing felt right nor fell into place.  And then, about 8 weeks ago, we both suddenly felt that it was right to do something totally different, something which would give the freedom to work in both the UK and the States, and not tie us to one timetable in one place.  Something where we could each use what the Lord has given us in ministry - Kim for mentoring and coaching younger clergy,teaching on church leadership, supporting those taking on larger churches; and me for retreats and pilgrimages and for spiritual direction for younger clergy women.

 

We started to look for a property in the UK to use as a base and a small retreat centre; in mid August I found one on the internet, went to the open morning and felt the calm and presence of the Lord as I walked in!  It's just 5 miles from our little Bolt Hole; it's an ancient farmhouse not too far from Bath, dating back at least to the early 17th century.

Suddenly as we started to pray about it everything began to fall into place VERY quickly. We had to put offers in by Wednesday 29th August.  Apparently ours was the lowest offer. But it's been accepted (unbelievable!) and we met with the sellers and spent an afternoon with them (they will be doing up the large barn across the driveway so will be near- neighbours) and they said they just felt they wanted us to have it.  Is that the Lord or what???  So we put our London flat on the market on a Wednesday and an offer was made on the Monday and we accepted it - it is not far short of what we have to pay for the Farm. WHAT provision!

 

Then, just as we were going to France for a week, I spotted a book on Kim's desk, which, he said at the time, he couldn't remember where it had come from. I read it whilst away, and the way I was praying about the Farm completely changed - from I WANT IT to PLEASE BLESS IT, please bless whoever lives there, please bless the village and all those there. So I spent the week praying that the Farm would be a blessing to whoever bought it and a blessing to those round about; and to be able to live lightly to it if we didn't get it. On returning, I phoned my friend who lives opposite Mays Farm and mentioned the book: Ray Godwin's 'Grace Outpouring.'  To which she replied that she and her husband read it a few years ago and have based their ministry in the area on that exact book and way of praying.

 

When Kim shared our vision for a little Retreat Centre at Mays Farm with the Church Wardens and Senior leaders at church, their reaction was been amazing: HUGE sorrow at the parting but HUGE belief that this is the right thing. And that if it's right for us it must be right for St James too.  So it has been announced in church today:  September 23: the exact second anniversary of my mother's tragic death.

 

We are now beginning to think more clearly about both the short-term and long-term futures! We are also having to scrimp and save - we need every last penny for this new project, as the house needs total renovation; it has not had anything done to it AT ALL for at least 50 years and even then not much was done.  Being an old farmhouse though that means that all the old (VERY old) stuff is still there - inglenook fireplaces complete with ancient spit hooks, copper sinks, stone fireplaces … and the dairy and the cheese room … the outside double toilet …. it is like a museum!! We love it.  I went into one old area and the new neighbour asked what I would do with that room and I heard myself say :This is the chapel. And so it will be. Not sure why I thought that….  but it's right.  The orchard will be full of little quiet spaces; there will be 6  bedrooms with private bathrooms, several of which will have adjoining sitting rooms with pull out beds;  so not a vast retreat centre, but it will sleep 12 - 14 comfortably.

A third of our time will be spent in the USA (spread out over the year) and Kim will work 75-80% of the year, to keep a better life/work balance; we will be setting up Trusts with a board of trustees to keep us accountable, in both the USA and the UK.

 

But a little sabbatical first, which will be a physical one: overseeing and doing a lot of the work on the house. And another little God-incidence: the Bishop wants to pay Kim until the end of March so we can have a 3 month sabbatical (and store our furniture in the Vicarage too)  Another HUGE provision whilst we begin the project. A friend in Bath is doing the plans; the builder, plumber, electrician are all signed up, and we hope to start the work in December - the solicitors are doing their usual thing at the moment with all the paperwork!

 

So my vision which the Lord is giving me is for THE VINE (my retreat house, based on my ordination verses from John 15) and there are 2 vines growing in the (walled!) large orchard.

It seems that the Lord has his hand on this.  We were given Isaiah 60:22 last week: "I am the Lord; in its time I will do this swiftly" and it really does feel as though this is His timing and He is doing it swiftly! Things are falling into place in remarkable ways in answer to prayers. We already have the chairman of the board of trustees for the UK.  God is being SO good. Of course, there is a long way to go yet, and I am sure there will be ups and downs.  BUT ….!

 

So now you know:  Mays Farm.  Our new home. We are moving after Christmas.

In need of some exercise?

in

On Wednesday - yes, THIS Wednesday, I shall meet this year's Pilgrims and we will head off to the Cotswolds for the Pilgrimage. I am excited ... apprehensive ... and I am sure they are too! Will you join us in spirit even if you are not with us physically?  I will be tweeting each day about our progress - find it here: @minstriesbydsgn And maybe you can take a few moments each day as you read our tweets to think about your own walk, your journey with Christ - maybe think about some of the verses which remind us that we walk by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7 ) that we need to keep in step with the Spirit  (Gal 5:16) and we are pressing on towards the goal! (Phil 3:12-14) For the Pilgrims next week, that goal is Bath Abbey, where we will be having our own service when we arrive  - footsore, maybe,  tired - but exhilarated no doubt! 100 miles up and down the Cotswold escarpment.

The Cotswold Pilgrimage

Chipping Campden to Bath Abbey

For centuries, Christians have walked to special places, to take time to be with God and allow God the time and space to work in their lives. A pilgrimage is a setting aside of one’s normal routine, and taking time to reflect on what the Lord is saying, and allowing the rhythm of the walk to give mental and spiritual refreshment. It is a physical expression of our spiritual journey with God; it is a time to enjoy the beauty of God’s creation in the company of others; and it is a desire to spend quality time with God in a new way.

This is what the Lord says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.” Jer. 6:16

SO HERE WE GO!  A Pilgrimage Walk in the stunningly beautiful hillsides of the English Cotswolds. We will be  spending 8 days on a vacation with a difference: walking on the ancient footpaths and pilgrim paths from Chipping Campden to Bath Abbey. It's the fourth time I've done this!

 

We will worship God in the beauty of His creation; take time to think of how we can live our lives as a daily offering of worship to Him; and allow ourselves the time and space to exercise spiritually as well as physically. Daily devotional talks each evening will be based on different Walks in Scripture or on verses we learn as we walk.  We will walk and talk, pray and sing, reflect and contemplate, listen for  that still small voice.

Join with us - in prayer, in time with God, maybe even in some extra exercise?

Might you share this?   - repost and retweet, as we'd love to have lots of people praying for us!

And why not think about doing the Pilgrimage with me next year?

Asking for your prayers - please?

in

Dear praying friends - I have a huge favour to ask of you!  As you know, I am leading a Pilgrimage again this year, with 12 of us walking from Chipping Campden to Bath Abbey, in just over a week's time: we meet on Wednesday September 12th and begin walking on Thursday morning. During the Pilgrimage, I will be leading and guiding the walking, and each evening giving a talk on a walk in Scripture.  There will be verses to learn as we walk, and times of prayer and meditation; and often I find I need to be spiritual director for some who want individual help.So my reason for writing is to ask if you would be willing to pray,  and especially to support me in prayer as I lead this week's adventure! I feel very ill-equipped, spiritually and physically, this year more than ever before; and desperately need prayer for strength, grace, wisdom and love.  Prayers for safety, too, as we walk up and down the Cotswold Escarpments, covering 100 miles in just 6 days; for good weather; for friendships to be made; and more than anything for each person to hear the Lord speak to her deeply. And pray for my husband Kim, left at home alone, not something he finds easy!  Thank you in advance for your prayers and support.  

Monday/Tuesday September 10/11th

I will be co-leading the Church Staff Retreat with Kim - I'm doing the cooking! Please pray for stamina and for a sense of excitement and anticipation, and that our recent holiday will have been really refreshing spiritually and physically.  

Wednesday September 12th 

The pilgrims meet at Heathrow Airport & a shuttle takes us to Chipping Campden. We'll have the first evening's session (each session includes worship, talk and prayers) Please pray for safety in travel, for safe arrivals, and for a good time as we begin to get to know one another.

Thursday September 13th

The Pilgrimage begins - with the longest day, 17 miles to Winchcombe. Please pray for stamina to walk and then to give a talk in the evening! And for good rest and sleep each night. 

Friday September 14th 

The shortest day, just 14 miles to Charlton Kings. Pray that I can find the hotel - it's off the Path and I have to map read a different footpath to get there!

Saturday September 15th

As we walk to Painswick, please pray that the meditations and spiritual exercises we will be doing as we walk each day will be meaningful and that the Lord will really speak to people in a deep lifechanging way.

Sunday September 16th

We head to North Nibley, where there is a huge monument to Tyndale, printer of the Bible in English.  Please pray that the Bible will come alive to us in new ways as we read and pray through Scripture, using Contemplative prayer and Lectio Divina.

Monday September 17th

Walking to Tormarten, we will gain views of the Severn estuary and the Welsh hills. Please pray that our horizons will be enlarged by the Lord and we will continue to be open to what HE may be saying to us; and for me to be a channel to be used by Him.

Tuesday September 18th

The final day, walking into Bath; and then a short service the Abbey itself. Then the final talk and Communion together. Please pray that we get there in one piece!  And for the final evening to be very special as we reflect on where we've come from and what we've learned, and what the Lord is leading us on to.

Wednesday September 19th

Parting after such a profound experience can be painful. Please pray that I am understanding and helpful; that people are depending on the Lord and not on one another; and that travels home are easy and uneventful for everyone.

THANK YOU for your prayers: we really really need them!

Time to start looking ahead?

in

And so it comes – the end of the idyll that was our summer. A summer’s worth of weeks. But now it’s time.  Time to return. Yet - time for a new thing.We felt it, American daughter and I.  Just a few days ago. The air is different, we said. It’s hotly glorious, sky clearly blue. But a change is coming. We know it. We can feel it. We can sense it. It feels good and right and timely.  Welcome, even.

So we put away our shorts and strappy tops.  There was the ceremonial binning of much-worn well-loved worn-out summer sandals. The joy of rediscovering favorite shrugs and cosy sweaters and proper shoes.  The purchase of a new woolen skirt and dressy pumps to accompany it and exultation in that feeling of being well-dressed after a summer of short shorts, skimpy skirts and simple sandals.

It’s time. Time to grow up again. Time for routines and schedules and restoring order.

And yet. And yet there lingers a love of lazy summer days, of daisies, doing whatever whenever. However. It will return, we promise ourselves: next year, it will come again, but for now we are content, with our summer memories and still-golden tans, content to let the summer go, thankful for all we have done and all we have been and all we knew, for those eight long weeks.

I pull on long pants, slip a shrug over my shoulders – and drive with the roof down still, enjoying natural air conditioning after the hot, heavy, closeness of the                                                                  humid summer air.

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Anticipation. I almost long to sharpen my pencils ready for the new school term, to begin a fresh exercise book with its invitation and expectancy and openness and possibilities.

To write my name on a new fly leaf and know I can begin afresh, in a new place with a new desk and new seat.

Time to return. Yet -

time for a new thing.

The promise is there.  I’m doing a new thing for you, says God.  Don’t you see it?

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. (Isaiah 43:18,19)

God says

CHANGE YOUR FOCUS:

STOP LOOKING BEHIND!

START LOOKING AHEAD!

Walter Brueggmann writes of this action of God:

“It is remarkable that Israel is told to forget the old exodus narrative in order to notice the new departure. The ‘new thing’ is not only more contemporary, but also more spectacular and exhibits the power of God in more effective ways. In these verses all the accent is upon the new experience which pushes the old memory aside. It may be worth noting that in the relationship between the Old and New Testaments, in so far as Christians are concerned, the same accent is upon the new at the expense of the old. Our God is doing a new thing.”

Our God is doing a new thing.

Because the past won’t sustain us. God says, Forget the former things, I am doing a new thing.

The children of Israel had seen God have many victories in their past.  It had been a good past. Leaving Egypt. Conquering the Land of Canaan. Fighting off prospective conquerors. Surviving a split in their country.

But all their previous victories were doing nothing for them in the present. They needed a new work, a new miracle, a new victory.

So the question isn’t: what has God done? There’s no doubt about that!

The question must be: What new thing is God doing right now?

The children of Israel had a choice to make. They were in exile, looking back at former glories.  And looking back wasn’t helping. Yet all they could see in the present was problems, and their own powerlessness. They didn’t like where they were at the moment, and yet they didn’t seem to trust God to change things for them nor to want to be open to the possibilities He had in mind for them.

And so there is a choice:

They can continue as they are, nostalgic for what has been, yet not happy in the present, not trusting the Lord.

Or they can focus on what God wants to do in their lives. And God wants to do a new thing.

Can I see possibilities if God is in charge of this new thing?

This summer is the end of two years of mourning.  I am returning – to the memories, to the second anniversary of The Day, to the return of what must become normal-but-without-her. Can I see possibilities if God is in charge of this new thing, this new life, this new beginning which is now offered me.  A chance to start over, sharpen the pencil, open the new page, take a new seat.  A new vision, a new calling, a new frame of mind.

Claim the new thing HE is doing for me.  In me.  Through me.

Returning – to a new thing.  It’s in the air around us. Routines. Schedules.  School. It’s time.  Time to return to God and to the new thing He is doing.

O gracious God

Give us wisdom to perceive you

Diligence to seek you

Patience to wait for you

Eyes to behold you

A Heart to meditate upon you

And a life to proclaim you

Through the power of the Spirit of Jesus Christ our Lord

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Amen.